I would say it is ironic for the brick wall to be the heavy in the auto-generated gallery, but it is so fitting irony doesn’t work. That day I was sitting in my parked car, thinking too much, observing the world around me, well, it really made me realize how much I was just banging my head against a wall and not really, truly doing anything to get anywhere with anything. I even took photos to prove it:
I was the person trying to gain status enough to walk through the Elysian fields. I was the old, decrepit, antiquated pole – useful, but just barely. I was the lamppost sitting there reflecting light, but not lit myself. I was the person sitting pretty in front of the rock wall instead of climbing it. I was the person who needs to hire someone else to figure out what happened in my own car. I was the person who can’t take a clear photo. I was the person hitting her head against a brick wall.
Notice I used the word “was” throughout the above paragraph. It isn’t lost on me that I just might have started changing my views about myself and the world around me since I was sitting in my parked car. All I needed to do to keep from hitting my head against a brick wall is change direction – any direction – to face AWAY from the brick wall. I realized that either 90 degree turn or a 180 degree turn or a 270 degree turn all will work.
I dug deep inside myself to find that the reason I felt these things while sitting in my parked car was because I thought those things. If I were to change perspective, just a little and focus on something else…
The lamppost may reflect light during the day, but when the night arrives, it lights the way. The pole may be old and decrepit, but it has weathered many storms and is still standing. The flowers may be sitting pretty, but their stems are growing and soon will overcome. The stain may be on the roof of my car, but it is over the seat only one person sits in – who needs a detective to figure that out? The window, the reflections, and the pollens may block the view of the flowers, but just knowing the flowers are there can bring a wonderous dream to life, with the right imagination. As for the Elysian fields, well, let’s just focus on the reflection caught in the trees, shall we?
Now, the brick wall is my proponent of change, not the obstacle I am hitting my head against any longer. All it took for this change, is the change of perspective, just the tiniest of things. Of course, I say that like it is the easiest thing in the world to do, even though I know it isn’t.